I haven't posted much lately, mostly because I've become somewhat consumed with this move and even I am getting tired of the incessant whining that has become my own personal soundtrack to accompany all things move related. There is little to update, but somehow I've managed to turn it into a post anyways. Go me!
- Right now the plan is this: We'll fly to CA sometime around the 21st of October and spend a few days shuffling through the available houses on the market. BG will come back mid-week to tie up loose ends at work and get the house packed up; LG and I will stay, continuing to look for a place to call home if we haven't found one to make an offer on before BG's return flight to Philly. If we have found and made an offer on a house, LG and I will spend our days lazing in the sun, sifting through the sand for seashells and watching unicorns prance lithely through fields of daisies while fairies and sprites feed us grapes and ambrosia under a gossamer canopy held aloft by serenading cherubs. Guess which scenario my money is on.
- The tree house is still on the market. We are waiting anxiously for the results of the two appraisals that were done last week to give us some indication of how much we stand to lose if a buyer doesn't appear in the next 3 weeks. For those of you whose reaction to that sentence is along the lines of "Huh?", here's how it goes: We can either sell the house ourselves in the normal fashion, or, after making a good faith attempt to do so, we can throw ourselves on the mercy of the Evil Empire and ask them to take it off our hands. To paraphrase the immortal Jessica Rabbit, "It's not really evil, it's just portrayed that way." That process has already been set into motion in the form of the two aforementioned appraisers(um, hello! The house has been on the market since April, people. I'd call 5 months of carrying our tissues down to the garage after each and every nose-blow JUST IN CASE someone wants to look at the house a pretty damn good faith attempt. Unfortunately there's been a shortage of Robinsons looking for tree houses in the Philadelphia area.). The Empire will take the average of the figures that they come back with and we have the option of selling the tree-house to them at that price*.
- On Monday the house will be inspected and tested; all of our worldly goods will be surveyed and cataloged. Crates will be ordered**, cranes will be scheduled***.
- Tuesday will mark the beginning of redefining life as we now know it. Meals will be less about nutritional content and more about consuming the remaining non-transportable items in our inventory. What do you mean we can't have rice, string cheese, and maple syrup for dinner? Rice = whole grains, Cheese = dairy, Maple = trees = vegetables. Throw in a few peanuts for protein and how much more balanced can nutrition get? Cleaning products, paints, and any thing remotely flammable will be gathered neatly into a pile in the garage and subsequently stared at as BG and I bounce the query "What the crap are we going to do with these?" aimlessly back and forth between us. With the exception of the wine. The wine we know what to do with. In fact, there's a good chance that taking care of the wine will lead to a solution for the cleaning products et al. Hopefully we will have the sense to wait to act on that solution until the next morning. Laundry will be sorted according to what will fit in the beast bags, prioritized by what we think we'll possibly need before the truck arrives at our new home (which could be a matter of days, weeks, or months, depending on how that initial bullet point up there goes). Trips to Goodwill will be come as frequent as trips to the library, the grocery store, and the park.
- Oh, and to add just a dash of excitement into our chaos soup, BG will be working 14+ hour days until the 9th. Ladies and Gentlemen, to truly enjoy any further programing, you should set your dials to the frequency of W-H-I-N-E! Thank you and enjoy the show.
*Appraisals just came in. Low. So now we can either dispute the results and hope for a better outcome, take the results and figure out how to make up the difference, or hope that the house sells on it's own and that the sale reflects the true market value****.
**This just doesn't fit in a standard packing box.
***This won't make it down these and has to go out this way. "'Ain't no ladder tall enough. Ain't no mover strong enough..."
****Um, yeah, so when establishing the appraised value of our house, we were dinged for things like "Limited street parking". Never mind that we have a garage. And live on one of the rare streets in this city that doesn't require a permit to park on it for more than 2 hours. What I want to know, is where did they draw their comps from? Middleton, Wisconsin? Silly me. I thought they'd use a place with similar square footage or, oh, I don't know, THE EXACT SAME FLOOR PLAN? Something like the one for sale next door that we SHARE A WALL WITH? Apparently? Not comparable.